I once heard a midwife say that a natrual birth is one of the best gifts you can give your baby. I believe this to be true. Having my babies is truely my greatest life accomplishment and I do not believe that I will ever do anything that will even come close to comparing.
Kaysha's Birth Story
This is my homebirth/waterbirth story. My parents were not real
sure what to think of the idea when I told them. Dh's parents were
much better taking the news, thankfully. I switched from an OB to MW
at 16 weeks. I researched my birth options and did not like the
hospital option, the thought of it made me feel sick. So I went
about my pregnant life answering all sorts of questions, you can
just imagine.
I was dilated to 4cm at 36 weeks. I was 75% effaced. My MW,
Toni, was shocked. I was thrilled thinking I was going to pop
any second. Then I was told by several that I could tarry for
weeks like that. Toni came to my house for the 37 week visit
to find I was still 4cm but 90% effaced. She could feel the
water buldging and told me if it weren't my first baby, she would
just pop the bag and we would have the baby. She was concerned as
she was leaving for the weekend.
On Friday, she gave me instructions for contacting the backup
MW, Mif, whom I had never met. I was praying not to have to.
Nothing like having your first baby, but then to do it with
someone you don't know. But Saturday arrived and dh and I had
to go shopping for me some new boots since the ones I wore had
holes, were scractched up and hurt my feet. I got some at JC
Penney and immediately took off the old ones, threw them in the
mall garbage and put on the new ones. Then we were off to buy
new tires for the truck. We ended up having to wait to get
them put on so went to dinner.
We got home at 7:30pm and I had a message from my mom who was
calling to she where we were all day and if anything was going on.
I called her and told her what we did and no, nothing going on.
I took a bath and remembered I forgot a magazine I wanted to look
at in the truck. I squatted to get my shoes on and felt a trickle.
I told dh, either I just peed in my pants or my water broke.
"Great" was his unimpressed response. SUre enough, it broke but
was a slow trickle. I called Mif, the backup and introduced myself,
and told her my water broke and the details of my last visit.
I had no contractions and she told me I could tarry a day or two
like that. I told her I would call her before bed and update her.
I called my mom back and needless to say, was she suprised.
I told her we were going to bed, me and my box of maxis.
At 10pm I called Mif and told her I was still leaking clear
fluid but was not contracting. We went to bed.
At 2:30am I was VERY rudely awakened by contractions. I got
immediately in the tub and told dh to call Mif again. SInce I
could talk through contractions, she told me to call her when I
could not. The tub was not helping so I got out and paced.
At 3:15 I was not talking through contractions. I remember
getting on the toilet to pee and telling dh to bring me a
garbage so I could throw up. He did, and I did, then handed
it to him to get rid of. It was quite an experience.
Dh called my mom and Mif and told them they needed to come.
My mom arrived at 3:45, much to dh's relief since he didn't
know what to do. I labored in bed and he kept running back and
forth looking out the window. Finally I told him to go one place
or the other and sit still. My mom was okay but didn't really
know what to do either. We had had a whole 2 lamaze classes
and I was trying out the Bradley method of relaxation, if
you could call it that. Finally at 4:15am Mif and her daugher
Laurie arrived. My mom and dh introduced themselves, and I
could hear them chatting as they approached the bedroom.
I think they must have expected a false alarm call becuase they were immediately silenced and taken aback when they came in my room.
Mif said she was glad she brought all her stuff since we were
obviously having the baby.
My contractions were not easily timeable. They would be like
90 seconds long with 20 seconds in between and then I would
have two on top of each other. They gave me a new breathing
technique that gave me relief. She checked me and I was completely
effaced and between 6-7. I thought for sure I should have
been done. They assumed Kaysha was face up since this was what
is referred to as back labor. I continued to labor on my side
with dh drilling his fists into my back, my poor mom holding my
hand, I think I probably hurt her. Mif and Laurie took turns
bringing warm towels for my tummy. After 45 minutes of this
I turned to the other side and continued what I thought was dying.
Finally, I had to pee so in my little 20 second break between
contractions, I ran to the toilet only to find my mom already on it.
She jumped off so I could get on only to have another contraction.
That was so awful. Then I told her I didn't think I could take
anymore. I got in the tub again thinking it could not be any
worse there. I don't think Mif realized I was planning a water
birth and they moved all their set up into the bathroom.
She checked me again to find I was complete. It was 5:30am.
Pushing sucked in my opinion. I was able to push when I felt
the urge and they did not do the counting thing or hold my legs.
I did what my body told me. I remember one contraction when
Kaysha's head was visible but not crowning and they all thought
I was going to push and I never got the urge. We all just kind of
laughed and I remember her saying that that was actually a
good thing to listen to your body and do what it says.
Finally Kaysha crowned and what a horrible feeling.
I think it took a few contractions to get her out, but
I remember her doing a sort of a twist on the way out
that righted her position, finally. They took her immediately
and put her on my chest. She seemed so little and she looked at
me and said "EEEEHHHHH" and that was it. Just a sound like,
"I am here, happy now?" and that was it. She never cried.
She was covered with vernix, the more there is, the earlier they are.
The MW's like to use it on their skin like lotion and for cuts.
Apparently the healing qualities are endless.
She was born at 6:33am on Sunday morning 10/20/96 weighing 7'4"
and measuring 19 inches. I did not get to hold her long as they
were concerned about my blood loss. Dh cut the cord.
Dh got her next in all her glory. They told him to take his
shirt off and put her on his chest. I think he was in a sort
of shock by then since she was neither clean nor dressed,
but he did as he was told. I ended up delievering the placenta,
and getting a shot to stop bleeding and make my uterus
clamp down. I remember getting out of the tub and feeling
dizzy and freezing. My mom and Mif bathed Kaysha and dressed her.
Then I ended up getting a few stitches as well.
Dh came in to tell me how pretty Kaysha was, I think
he was suprised! The stitches never really bothered me,
but nothing like that to make you feel like you would never
be done. Everyone stayed til 10:30am making sure I was
okay and Kaysha was nursing. Then they all left. I wanted
to sleep but just ended up staring at her for hours.
It was truely an experience that none of us will forget.
I ended up having her on the day of my baby shower, ooops.
One guest acutally came over that night and about died when
she saw I had Kaysha. Then I told her she was only
12 hours old and I thought she would faint.
It was pretty priceless!
Daniel's Brith Story
As soon as I confirmed pregnancy, I was so thrilled to call my MW! However, I am so embarrassed to say that when US told us the baby was a boy, I was less than thrilled.
I had BH contractions from about 34 weeks so at my 36 week home visit, I had my MW check me. I was already 3cm with baby at 0. I thought for sure I would have Daniel on 9/1. My due date was 9/23. My MW had a trainee at that time whom I just adored too named Selina and she was sure I would go anytime. But on 9/1 I got the flu and was puking my guts out and miserable for three days. I was hoping to NOT go into labor like that since I knew I could not do it. And with only Kaysha's birth as a referrence, I KNEW I did not want to have that again while sick. But my MW assured me that my body knew it was sick and would not do anything. At my 37 week check, I was at a 4 but by then I figured that Daniel was not too anxious to show up. They asked me if I wanted to do castor oil and I said NO. I wanted him to come when he wanted, I did not want to pick the day. So home I go. But at the end of the pregnancy, you want to be done, and then again, the wonderment of it all made me want to wait on Daniel. Plus I didn't know what I would do with a boy anyway so he could just bake. I went for my 38 week check on 9/9. Dh and I had had some fun in bed that morning too!! I arrived grouchy like you are at the end. Toni, my MW took one look at me and asked if I was in labor. NO, I say madly. Selina checks me and tells Toni I am at a 3. WHAT? Toni checks and says "Oh my Lord," I ask what the problem is. She tells me I am at a 6 and the bag is buldging. Then she feels my uterus only to tell me I am contracting. Then she tells me I will probably have Daniel in a ditch on the way home if my water should break. I tell her it hasn't broke yet, it probably won't. She hooks me up to the monitor and I am contracting every five minutes. She tells me to drop Kaysha off at the IL's, call dh home from work and call my mom, we are having the baby today. I am happy and a bit overwhelmed and thinking that this one will just fall out now. We made arrangements to meet at the house at 1pm and it was like 10am then. I dropped Kaysha off to a bewildered FIL and went home, called dh and my mom. Apparently FIL was worried since he sent SIL, who I wasn't too impressed with at that time, over to check on me. I was busily cleaning the tub when she let herself in. I sent her right back home. I called my mom who promptly left work. Dh arrived an hour or so later and told me he had to stop at MacDonalds on the way home to have diahrea, hahahahahaha, I laughed SO hard and will never forget it. My mom arrived and I reminded her we had two bathrooms this time around since last birth dh walked in on her a few times while she was trying to go. Then she had to get off so I could go. She was impressed. We cleaned up and finally the MW's arrived. To my suprise and joy, the MW, Mif who delivered Kaysha also came so I had three MW's. They checked me again and I was at a 7, but they wanted me to be contracting steadily before they broke my water. Dh and I walked all over the neighborhood. At 2pm, they broke the bag. To my complete dismay, my dear MIL shows up at 3pm. My labor completely stopped. The MW's laughed and said how funny our bodies are that we can do that. She only came to get clothes for Kaysha. At 4pm we were walking, talking, laughing and I was contracting but it was a big party. They were all looking at Home Interior catalogs and dh was surfing the net. I was thinking that I was making money since they were doing all their Xmas shopping early. At 5pm, I was starting to feel the contractions and Toni led me to the toilet for my "toilet hugging session" as dh likes to refer to it. He laughed SO hard that I kicked him out. I could hear him and my mom visiting and laughing and I told them to shut up or go outside. Then Mif came in and asked Toni if she could take over. She did. All of a sudden it was just she and I and it was lovely. Every contraction required my full attention by then. I was contracting every two minutes but they only lasted like 45 seconds. She would time them and as I did the breathing she would tell me when they would peak and when they would be done and it helped SO much. In between contractions I remember feeling normal. If they stopped altogether it would not have suprised me. I kept thinking they would get worse like with Kaysha but they never did...At some point I told her either I needed to poop or push and she checked me. I was complete except for a cervical lip. Dh came in about that time and I told him I was ready to get in the tub. He filled it up and I got in but with the next contraction completely lost all bearings. On the toilet, I had a pillow in the tank and held on for dear life during a contraction. In the tub, I had a pillow for my back but I asked Mif to help me to cope. She helped me find the handle of the tub and dh held my hand. She checked me again and still found the lip. By then everyone was in my little bathroom watching. She asked me to push a little at the end of each contraction and I remember the tremendous relief of just letting go but not actually doing any work. A few of those passed and still a lip. She told me that she could hold it up and I could push. That sounded great to me so she held it. When the next contraction hit, I yelled for her to STOP holding it because the pain was more than I could bear. This was the only loud thing I said throughout the whole labor. At the same time I pushed and out came Daniel. Selina almost missed it. I heard someone tell me to stop but that wasn't about to happen. My mom told me she was praying out loud for him to come out. He did at 6:08 They put him on my breast and he was crying the most pittiful cry I had ever heard. I was crying too and tried to console him. I was consumed with an emotion I did not get with Kaysha. All I knew is that I did not want him to cry. At that moment, it no longer mattered that he was a boy and I stupidly did not want one. I held him for what seemed like ten minutes and it probably was. He was the sweetest little man and I didn't want to let go of him Dh cut the cord and took him wrapped in warm towels, again with his shirt off and got in our bed. I pushed out the placenta and I remember thinking that I could not believe it was over that fast. I got out immediately after and I remember feeling great. I was not cold or shaky like with Kaysha. I had no excess blood loss or problems with uterus clamping like last time. Toni and Selina showed me the placenta and pointed out a white cross that was on it. They said they don't see it too often but it is a sign of a very healthy pregnancy. I wish someone would have taken a picture of it. I got dressed and sat on the bed as they looked at Daniel. They could not believe how big he was. His hands were huge. We took guesses at his weight. He was 8'9" and 21 inches. I was pretty amazed too since I had no tearing and he came out in one push. They finally got him checked out and my mom dressed him and then he nursed for the first time. I felt all the guilt melt away at that moment. I was not successful in nursing Kaysha and always felt guilty about it. I was completely healed. Everyone left at 7:30 except Mif who had to leave right after he came out to go to the hospital to work her other job. I made some dinner and called some friends. I felt absolutely great. I decided to get back in the tub at 8pm since I really wasn't clean..........Mif came back at about 9pm and stayed for awhile. She was so suprised I did not tear at all. She held Daniel and I told her how happy I was she had came again. She ended up leaving at around 10pm and dh, and Daniel and I went to bed together. It was like heaven
Samuel's Birth Story
Well, he did not exactly fall out, but..........
I woke up Sunday, April 21 to my dh shaking the bed, yet again, telling the baby he should come so dh would not have to go to work. After days, weeks and even months of contx, I was already dilated to 4cm, head engaged and 75% effaced. I started losing the mucus plug at 33 weeks. My MW was concerned I would go into preterm labor or labor so fast she would not make it. I had toyed with the idea of UC anyway and did lots of research and prepped dh for such an occurance. But when I finally reached 37 weeks, the safe time to have this baby at home, I got a huge sinus infection that lasted til I delivered. I was pretty upset when I realized I was getting sick since I knew that I would not go into labor sick. At the same time, I wondered if labor would knock it out of me and I would get better upon delivery. But again, I have learned that baby knows best.
Dh left for work at 7am and I managed to sleep til 8am even though the kids were running around the house. Daniel came in and asked me if I would make him a hot chocolate so I got up to do that and have some coffee. I noticed that I was feeling somewhat better. As I was pouring my coffee, I realized that I was leaking fluid. I had to stop and think a minute since everytime I coughed or sneezed I literally lost my bladder. No, I did not cough or sneeze so it could not be pee. I squatted and sure enough, more fluid. I was happy and sad too. I had really wanted to labor with membranes intact this time, but realized it was not an option. Even so, I drank lots of water through the day.
With Kaysha my membranes ruptured this same way and true labor did not start til seven hours later so I figured I had some time. I called my MW, Toni, who was elated that she would actually make it to the birth. I told her no contx and I would call her later. I called dh's mom who agreed to pick up the kids at noon. I called dh at work and told him he finally got his wish. We agreed he would also come home at noon. So I spent the day cleaning up, and getting ready. I ate a good breakfast, and had a good lunch once I realized that no labor was real imminent. Dh's parents did not arrive til 1pm. I told the kids that Samuel would be coming out of mommy's tummy today and that they would be going to Nana and Papa's for the day/night. I don't know if they were happier to be going there, or that the baby was coming, LOL!
I thought once they left that labor would pick up. Dh came home, but no such luck. I had spoken with Toni a few times that day to tell her nothing was really happening, just sporadic contx that did nothing but let out more fluid. I told her I was going to take a nap. We agreed she would arrive at 4pm to do the abx since unfortunately I had a weakly positive GBS test. I was going to refuse the abx initially, but then I got sick, and then my membranes were ruptured, so that ended that in my mind. It was a tad disappointing, but I got over it quickly.
I was unable to nap so got up after tossing and turning an hour. Who can sleep when you know you are going to have a baby? Plus I was leaking with every movement but it was a great opportunity to see how absorbant the cloth menstrual pads were.
Dh did rest and was watching a movie when I came back downstairs. I was starving again so I ate lightly this time. Toni arrived at 5pm, late as usual, don't set a clock by her, LOL! I was suprised that she brought everything and stated she was not leaving til the baby was born. "I know you," she said. I have told her every visit that I do not plan to labor long. I told her contx were still between 5 and 10 minutes apart and easy. She told me her thought was that only the outer bag was ruptured and the inner was not. We would see later. She set up, and proceeded to do the abx. By the time it was done, my clothes were completely wet from fluid. At that point I changed to those lovely diapers for PP. But we had a lovely chat. She called the other MW, Mif, who delivered Kaysha, and assisted on Daniel's birth. Asked her if she could attend. Her mom was in town for her birthday and she was not sure if she could get away. Toni told her she would page her later when things got going.
She checked me at 6:30, found me to be 5-6cm 85% effaced, and the baby still had a membrane covering his head. She snagged the bag and the rest of the water went out. Then she could feel his hair. Let me just say that AROM was not what I wanted initially but at that point after leaking all day, and dh taking half the day off, I was ready to L&D so I agreed. Immediately, I started having contx and they were not the fun variety either. I knew that with the water gone, it would not be easy. Baby was positioned on the right side and Toni thought he would move to the left side, which is more advantageous for speedy delivery, but he did not. As a result, I had very sporadic contx from then on. They would last a minute, and then 30 seconds later an "aftershock" as Toni called it. Then maybe two minutes would pass and another huge one. Dh made a fire which I enjoyed about five seconds before forgetting about it. I walked and breathed through contx and coped well. I must have gave dh a terrible look that made him ask me if I was going to cuss at him soon. I asked him when I ever did that in labor and he replied that I was acting suprised at how the contx felt. But I literally went from no pain, to major contx. Probably what it must feel like when an epidural wears off and you get hit big time with active labor. Apparently I asked dh three times if he put batteries in the digital camera but I guess it took that many times for the answer to sink in as I was literally in another place. About 7pm the contx felt pushy and I let Toni know. She checked me again at 7:30pm to find I was 7cm. I admit I was disappointed after an hour of labor, I figured I was farther. But she paged Mif, and she was able to come and did arrive at 8pm. I was very happy about that. She came in and hugged me between contx. I told her I was happy to see her just in time to be hit by another contx. At that point I had stopped walking through them and was leaning forward at the kitchen table now "shushing" through them. Toni felt my neck to see if it was sweating yet, no, it was not. But the next contx found me in a major sweat. I decided to tie up my hair at that point and try to go to the bathroom again. Toilet labor was more that I could even bear. I decided to get in the tub at that point. I hoped it would al be over soon. The MW's brought their stuff near and then Toni checked me again. I was 8cm. Why did this seem so SLOW?
But labor changed for about ten minutes when I got in the tub. The contx were easier and more time passed between them. A lovely break. The MW's stayed pretty much in the kitchen from that point on drinking coffee and enjoying the cake I made for our anniversary the day before. Dh and I each were pouring water over my stomach through contx. After my short break of "easy" contx, the big ones came again and were as sporadic as ever. Some seemed to last forever. At some point I could no longer pour the water on myself so it was just dh. He said his arm was really sore the next day! We talked in between the contx and the MW's brought me a glass of water. I asked them for some alcohol, just for comic relief!! I was amazed at how thirsty I was in between and immediately felt sorry for women who are not allowed to eat and drink in labor. Even my stomach started growling at one point and boy was that annoying. Not to mention my nose dripping off and on. Between contx I would tell dh, "that was awful, we aren't doing this again, are you praying for me?" Once I asked him to pray for me, things moved right along. He never left my side. One contx made me want to claw the wall and I reached for it and dh then took my hand and held it the rest of the time. I grabbed one of the kids' toys on the other side and squeezed it during contx. At some point I felt inside myself to see where the baby was and how much cervix was left. I felt his head, and hair, and could tell that I was completely effaced, but was unsure of where the cervix was. The MW's must have felt the contx were getting the job done so they came back in to check. Mif had come in occasionally to snap a pic or two. She had never used a digital cam before and found out how fun it was and ended up with great pics for us to enjoy after. Toni checked me at 9pm to find I was complete and baby was right there. However after sitting on my butt for an hour, it must have fallen asleep as I had no urge to push at all. The contx kept coming and were not pleasant either. Toni kept telling me I was almost done and I am sure I gave her the blank stare as I thought, uh, huh, right. Dh had his hand on my leg and the other still holding my hand. He took his hand off my leg and I remember vividly feeling alone and asked him to keep it there and don't ever move it again. We all later thought I was drawing strength from him. The next day he was more tired than I. The MW's commented that I would just "shush" the baby out. I tried to push at the end of a contx and realized that I still could not feel a thing. Then I realized that what I thought was me pushing was not pushing at all. I felt done, like I could take no more. I decided I was going to be done at that point and with the next contx, pushed for all I was worth. Here I thought I could push without screaming, but no such luck. I felt him move, finally, and out came his head. I felt the ring of fire briefly, but pushed on. The MW's told me to stop and blow, but no, I pushed again and was suprised that his body was SO BIG. I pushed it out while saying something like it is stuck when it was not, it was just another big push. So out he came in two pushes and though I really wanted to catch him, I was too busy pushing to even remember. Toni caught him and put him on my chest. I was SO relieved, I cannot even tell you how thankful I was. Samuel was born at 9:05pm, came out screaming. No need for suctioning. He cried and cried and I felt so sorry for him and his rude entrance into the world. Mif was taking pics like crazy and after Samuel was out, I felt amazingly better than ever. They brought the warm towels from the dryer and Samuel stopped crying, finally, I thought he would cry forever. Everyone commented on how much he looked like Daniel. He did. The placenta detached from me after about five minutes which is a feeling I never felt before. Out it came before we even had the cord cut. Then the huge gush of blood. There was no blood til that point. Toni let the water out and began to fill the tub with more but I was ready to get out and see how big this baby was and get a good look at him. So they helped me rinse off and dh took Samuel. Samuel nursed at 9:20pm, weighed in at 8'15" and 21" long. Apgars of 9 and 10. I hoped he would be bigger to make up for all the weight I gained, LOL. But he was just perfect and now very content to be with me, nursing and just wrapped in warm towels. I was checked and had no tears, etc. The MW's ended up staying til 11:30 checking out the digital pics, visiting, and doing the charting. Then they were off to eat some dinner while we did the same at home.
It was truely our best birth experience yet. Dh commented that the time we were alone laboring was about as "on our own" as he was ready for. In retrospect, it was a very bonding time for us. The birth wasn't my "dream" birth, but then that was of me waking up with him crowning!! So all in all, I am very happy with the outcome.
